How To Truly Fix People (Jordan B. Peterson)

You may ask or hear asked,

‘How can I help my parents, friend or peers sort themselves out?’

AKA,

‘How do I fix someone I care about?’

“The first question should be, do they want to sort themselves out? Because it’s not that easy to help people if they don’t want to be helped. If they do want to be helped, listening is a great first strategy.”

“You have the question right if you’re asking ‘how do I x to sort themselves out, which is very different than how can I sort my parents out.”

“You help people to sort themselves out ONCE they’ve decided to do so by giving them the opportunity to talk about their concerns and outline potential solutions.”

“You don’t want to offer too many pieces of advice while you're doing that because it turns out that people are much more likely to implement a strategy of improvement if they generate it themselves. Also you don’t steal the accomplishment from them of figuring things out for themselves.”

“Moreover, if you listen to someone come up with a solution on your behalf, you don’t undergo the neurological transformations necessary to change your character. But if you come up with the solutions yourself, then you’ve changed your own…